LOVE – THE WAY
The Mantra: Om Bhaava Prachodayate
Instead of seeking Love outside yourself, become free from
all the barriers that consciously or unconsciously
you have erected against it.
Which barriers have you erected against it?
How do they make you feel?
Why part of you is afraid of love?
On which levels of your being?
a) What must be realized is that
It is only possible to really love
through Divine Love.
Only He can love in us, for what we appear to be –
our self-image, ego and superficial personality
are incapable of real love.
Most people are lost in the dream of their life and what they call “love” is still only part of the Dream.
The Quest’s advice is:
Concentrate on your heart, listen to its heartbeat,
feel the divine spark within it,
see how while you looks at it this spark becomes a burning flame rising more and more, feel how this pure flame of love burns, and while burning dissolves every doubt, contradictions and fears, every worry.
They are all dissolved like by magic.
When Mère asked the Divine about love His reply was:
Love me in all things, everywhere and in all beings” was Thy reply.
I prostrate myself before Thee and ask of Thee
to give me that power.
Rumi adds that:
Love looks like fire…feed yourself into it,
be the fireplace and the wood!
Love is the Water of Life. Drink it down
with heart and soul.
Without love, no one has the right to enter His house.
They ask: “What is love?” Reply:
Giving up your self-will.
How will you give up your self-will?
Real Love fills the deepest levels of our being,
but to find it we must first utterly open ourselves and be completely defenseless and vulnerable,
accept to be hurt if it needs to be, and sacrifice all the parts
of our being incapable or unwilling to love.
To which extent do you feel ready to do this?
It will come.
The Book of Privy Counseling agrees and says that in the way of real love
the lover will utterly and completely despoil himself
of everything, even his very self,
because of the one he loves. He cannot bear to be clothed in anything save
the thought of his beloved.
Heed these warnings:
To cheat oneself out of love is the most terrible deception; it is
an eternal loss for which there is no reparation,
either in time or in eternity.
Are you SURE that you NEVER cheat yourself out of love?
The Bhagavad Purana:
Fruitless is knowledge of love devoid,
fruitless religion itself if loveless. Vain all struggle for spiritual life
remains without love in one’s heart.
How much love is in YOUR heart?
Even donating hundreds of bowls of food several times a day
doesn’t equal to the spiritual progress gained
in one moment of true love.
He who can love can be; he who can be can do;
he who can do is.
To love one must first forget all about love. Make it
your aim and look for direction. As we are
we cannot possibly love.
Why must we first forget all about lover in order to love?
Why can’t we love as we are?
What are we?
Jean Marc Mantel:
The exploration of the question of love needs real sincerity and authenticity
in order to explore what love is not, for understanding that a desire
to be loved or a desire to give love, is simply a reaction.
What remain is no more desire to love and no more
desire to be loved.
What is left then?
Just pure LOVE.
Love is dying every day. Love is not memory;
love is not thought.
Love is not a thing that continues as duration in time. And, through observation, one must die to the continuity of everything. There is love;
and with love, there comes creation.
Why is Love dying every day?
Whatever you withhold love from,
whether in the past or present,
will imprison you…
Love or perish, that’s the rule.
True loving must be pure,
empty of all attributes.
It contains no I
and no other.
The essential point is that:
Avoiding love in order not to suffer is very similar
to avoid breathing for fear of dying.
Is this an exaggeration?
Not so much.
Mother Teresa advises to:
Spread love everywhere you go: first of all in your own house.
Give love to your children, to your wife or husband,
to a next door neighbor…
Let no one ever come to you without leaving
better and happier.
How do people usually feel when they come to you?
c) So how shall we find true love?
Open yourself as much as possible and confront the parts of yourself resisting it even if this brings about a measure of confusion or sorrow,
for it is always a small price pay for it.
Bring unconditional love into every aspect of your life, from how you relate to others to the worldliest tasks, do even such humble things as cooking or cleaning your room with love.
To John Lennonit could not have been simpler:
It matters not who you love, where you love, why you
love, when you love or how you love,
it matters only that you love.
True or false?
Rumi point out his own way to it:
Would you become a pilgrim on the road to love?
The first condition is to make yourself
humble as dust and ashes.
Be drunk with love because it there in everything that exists.Without the fullness of love and its sharing there is no other way to God.
Whether your love comes from the earth or from heaven
will ultimately take us there.
Will ultimately also take you there.
St Francis of Assisi adds that:
We learn to speak by speaking, study by studying, run by running, work
by working; likewise
we learn to love by loving.
All those who think to learn it any other way
are deceiving themselves.
Did you think that you could learn it any other way?
Don’t be deceived.
The Course in Miracles makes a very important point:
The search for love is but the honest searching out of everything
that interferes with love.
What in you interferes with love?
Only when we give our love joyfully, without hesitation
or thought of personal benefit we will reach
its most exalted peaks.
If you have a difficulty with it the only remedy give up judgment, fear, resentments, shame, hurt and any expectations that your love be returned to you,
and never close your heart for fear
of any future suffering.
Am I capable to love very intensely but still making
Whoever I love feel completely free?
If not, why not?
d) Let us ask again:
how shall we find true love?
In a certain sense, this is a false question, for actually
there is no need to seek love – it is always
all around us, in US all the time
As already mentioned, we should instead
discover and take down all the barriers that we have set up against it.
We cannot “find” love, only share the measure of it
that we already have with others.
The Ammachi presents another aspect of it:
Love will swallow you. It will eat you up completely until there is no “you” and
there is only love. Your whole being will be transformed into love.
Spiritual love culminates in unity, in Oneness.
According to Eckhart Tolle.
The only way that love can come into your life is not through form,
but through that inner spaciousness that is Presence.
Love has no form.
Erich Fromm adds that:
The main condition for the achievement of love
is the overcoming of one’s narcissism.
Mere males the main point:
It is not the love that someone feels for you that can make you happy,
it is the love that you feel for others that makes you happy,
for you receive the love that you give from the Divine
who loves eternally and unfailing.
e) We can begin by experiencing love for someone in particular,
but it will remain mere human “love” until we learn to feel it
for everyone and everything, then it will grow
into Divine Love.
But how to reach such an exalted state?
It becomes easier to love all is we only imagine the untold suffering, material and psychological almost everyone is enduring, their fears, anxieties, never having felt really loved, or not for long
If you accept completely love unconditionally on all levels of your being
then Divine Love will already be there in you.
Rumi’s advice is:
A spirit that lives in this world
and wears not the shirt of love
such existence a deep disgrace is.
Be foolish in love
for love is all there is.
There is no way into presence
except through a love exchange.
If someone asks what is love
answer: dissolving the will.
if Love springs from loneliness and insecurity, from a need of support,
then it is no real love at all
we can only really love another after we have reached
a measure of centering in our inner being.
Nisargadatta Maharaj reminds us that:
In a dream you love some and not others. Awakening you will discover
that you are Love itself embracing all.
Personal love, no matter how intense and genuine,
inevitably ties you up: love in freedom
is the love of all.
for most to truly, completely love like the Divine does is the most difficult thing and often the ultimate test and achievement on the Path.
But no price, however high, is ever too much for it because
without love in the heart our life is like a slowly
dying tree in a rainless desert.
Krishnamurti sums it all up thus:
The moment you have in your heart this extraordinary thing called love and feel
the depth, the delight, the ecstasy of it, you will discover that for you the world is transformed.
Let love remain always a sharing and never just a need or,
even worse, a dependency like a crutch.
Do not say only: “Love is in my heart.”
But tell yourself:
I feel the Divine’s Love in my heart because
He is in my heart.
To which extent can you FEEL that you are in His Heart?
When the Kabuli was asked how we can love perfectly the Compassionate, He replied:
Love Allah like the mother camel loves her newborn, like a leaf
adores the dewdrop on it, like the fire loves wood,
like parched trees love rain…
To which extent can you do this?
If not, or not enough, how will you reach such an exalted state of being?
The Buddha agrees and His advice is:
Love the whole world as a mother
loves her only child.
The Devil’s Advocate:
Yeats wrote: “But Love has pitched his mansion in the place of excrement; for nothing can be sole or whole that has not been rent.”
Well, my client not only tears it apart all the time, he also flushes it right down the toilet as well!
The only way to learn how to love
is simply by loving.
Love is freedom, it is our birthright, fear and limitations what we learned
from almost everyone else. Love and Life are always in expansion,
egoism and contractions the beginning of death.
Love unconditionally, without expecting anything in exchange:
there can be no highest wonder and joy.
Words of Power:
Of all human emotions and feelings, only Love is ever real,
the wondrous dawn of our heart
Only those who have already found who they really are
and let go of all that they have ever been
can really love.
“Let love be your greatest aim.”
“I know of only one duty, and that
is to love.” Camus
“The first duty of love is to listen.”
“Life is Love’s way: without it like mere bones
covered by dry skin are we all.”
“Live every day as if it was the only one. Not the first,
nor the last. The only one.” Neruda
“True loving must be pure, empty of all attributes.
It contains no I and no other.”
“Close your eyes. Fall in love. Stay there.”
“Love is my only companion.”
“You can love only as God loves. Seek not to, love unlike Him,
for there is no love apart from His.”
The Course in Miracles
From “The Quest”:
When I first read this sentence of Mère:
“In its essence and origin Love is like a white flame
obliterating all resistances.”
I asked myself how bright was this flame in me, for it had not yet obliterate many of my resistances.
Why this flame has not yet overcome them?
Of course, it is not yet bright enough.
But after having seen Mere, it ought to be.
Then why it wasn’t bright enough yet?
There was only one possible answer:
I am not yet truly myself.
There can be no more terrible feeling.
Looking backwards now I am SHOCKED to see how little love was in my heart, hardly any at all.
The turning point finally came when I met my beloved soulmate Prema Devi, for she taught me how to expand all the infinite love which I felt for Mere and for her, for the Divine, into the whole world and everyone I meet.
How I feel now about love is best expressed by Rumi:
“I will tell you what love is: to enter
a mine of gold.”
From the poem Right Living Hints:
Love absolutely ALL
otherwise like a dewdrop
on a leaf your love will be
soon dissolved by the rising sun.
What a terrible loss.
Question/ko’han 1 and 2:
To find genuine love instead of seeking it too directly first of all
discover all the barriers that you have set
in yourself against it.
Which barriers have you set against love, at least to some extent?
Whenever we deny love to anyone
we deprive ourselves of the capacity
to feel the Divine’s love for us.
Do you ever deny love to anyone? Why?
From the most ancient times many Teachers emphasized that
to love is to die.
To die to our ego, to all that we have ever been.
You may understand this mentally,
but to which extent can you FEEL it?
Only when we let go of the false image that we have of ourselves
we can reach the true Divine Love.
Ever tried that?
Shams of Tabriz said that:
All our love’s troubles are caused only
by “I” and “we.
Do you think that your love troubles, if any, are caused by anything else?
Don’t be deceived.
Rumi said that
Love is for vanishing
into the sky.
How often do you feel that you are vanishing into the sky?
Teilhard de Chardin has the last word:
Someday, after mastering the winds, the waves, the tides and gravity, we shall harness for God the energies of love,
and then for a second time in the history of the world
man will have discovered fire.
1) Consider this passage of Muktananda
It is not surprising that we keep looking for love, because we are all born of love. We come out of love. All of us are nothing but vibrations of love.
We are sustained by love, and in the end we merge back into love….
This world is nothing but a school of love;
our relationships with our husband or wife, with our children and parents, with our friends and relatives are the university in which we are meant to learn what love and devotion truly are.
Yet the love we experience through other people is just a shadow
of the love of the inner Self
There is a sublime place inside us where love dwells….
The love that pulses in the cave of the heart does not depend
on anything outside. It does not expect anything.
It is completely independent.
2) Meditate on these words of Vivekananda:
Love we hear spoken of everywhere Everyone says, “Love God.” Men do not know what is love; if they did, they would not talk so glibly about it.
Every man says he can love, and then, in no time, finds out that there is no love in his nature… The world is full of the talk of love, but it is hard to love. Where is love? How do you know that there is love?
The first test of love is that it knows
So long as you see a man love another only to get something
from him, you know that that is not love;
it is shopkeeping.
We see love everywhere in nature. Whatever in society is good and great and sublime is the working out of that love; whatever in society is very bad, nay diabolical, is also the ill-directed working out of the same emotion of love.
Love should be unrelated.
Even when we love wrongly, it is of the true love, of the true bliss; the power is the same, use it as we may. Its very nature is peace and bliss.
The murderer when he kisses his baby forgets for an instant all but love.
Give up all self, all egotism, get out of anger, lust, give all to God.
“I am not, but Thou art; the old man is all gone,
only Thou remainest.” “I am Thou.”
3) Follow the Buddha’s advice:
Let your love flow outward through the universe,
To its height, its depth, its broad extent
a limitless love is there without hatred or enmity.
Then as you stand or walk,
sit or lie down, as long as you are awake,
Strive for this with a one-pointed mind;
Your life will bring heaven to earth.
1) This passage of J. K. Simmons about how most people who are in love experience it:
The more a person is “in love,” the more avenues open up for the expression of relational energy within the ever-present information exchange of life.
Romantic literature extols the beauty of the world as lovers suddenly find themselves experiencing new and exciting levels of energy exchange that seem to pervade all life experiences.
Life really does “feel” fuller, more complete, and definitely more satisfying.
even the nagging sense of existential emptiness is stilled. Everything
“looks” more beautiful; life is good; there is time to “stop
and smell the roses” when a person is “in love”.
2) These words of Vivekananda:
The same fire that cooks a meal for us may burn a child, and it is no fault of the fire if it does so; the difference lies in the way in which it is used.
Therefore love, the intense longing for association, the strong desire on the part of two to become one – and it may be, after all, of all to become merged in one – is being manifested everywhere in higher or lower forms as the case may be.
The love of the Self is selfless and unconditional.
It is not relative. It is completely free.
It is self-generated and it never dies. This kind of love knows no distinction between high and low, between man and woman. Just as the earth remains the same no matter who comes and goes on it, so true love remains unchanging and independent.
Love penetrates your entire being. Love is Consciousness. Love is bliss.
It does not exist for the sake of something else.
It is supremely free.
The path of inner love leads a lover to God. As a person walks
on this inner path of love, he not only attains love,
but merges in the ocean of love.
3) This passage of Krishnamurti:
We want to be sure of love, to peg it down
so that it won’t elude us;
we reach conclusions, make agreements about it; we call it by various names, with their special meanings; we talk about ‘my love’, just as we talk about ‘my property,’ ‘my family,’ ‘my virtue,’ and we hope to lock it safely away, so that we can turn to other things and make sure of them too;
but somehow it’s always slipping away
when we least expect it.
What can we do about it then?
He adds that:
In the flame of intense meditation thought ceases and with it
the feeling, for nor one nor the other is love.
Without love there is no essence, without love there are only the ashes upon which is based our existence.
Love…is of Light a beam
which was never real –
making it real.